Let’s See If We Can Get These Words Canceled
Cancelation can be cool. 😎
When I first heard about cancel culture, I was like, “Oh no! What if something I’ve written gets me canceled!” Then I realized I’m not famous, rich or important, so cancelation would likely have no meaningful impact on my life. They don’t take away your Netflix password when you’re canceled. Or prevent you from crying into a pint of ice cream every night, your tears dripping a salty river of pain into the buttery morass of cookie dough while you ponder the inherent meaninglessness of your life and all the things you expected to accomplish by now.
So, I should be fine.
With time I gained perspective. No, I didn’t stop crying into my ice cream, but I did realize there’s no reason for me to be afraid of cancelation. It doesn’t have to be bad. It can be great! There are a lot of things I’d like to cancel. Wet socks. Fart smells on the bus. People who say “that’s funny” and don’t laugh. Cancer, I guess.
This is a moment of great opportunity where we can cancel nearly anything we want! Here are some words I’d like to cancel:
Espresso
It’s not that I don’t like espresso. I love it. But everytime I try to pronounce the word, it comes out “ex-no-essshpresso.” This does not impress people. I’m…
