The Moist Wars
Fun for everyone to enjoy, okay, maybe not everyone, but someone.
A year ago I got ten likes on a tweet and grew mad with power, using my newfound fame to jump on the cancel train and cancel a word or two. I canceled “cheugy” (you haven’t seen it around, have you?) and also stopped people from using “ninja” in job descriptions.
Everyone was really cool about it. They supported me.
Until I tried to cancel “moist.”
You’d think I kicked someone’s favorite puppy (I would never do that — I only kick unpopular dogs —I AM KIDDING). All these moist stans crawled out of the woodwork to tell me I had it wrong. They defended moist. They said canceling it would result in dry muffins. They even said hating on moist is sexist! Can you believe it? I can’t possible be sexist. There are three women in my family and one of them is me.
With the hard-earned hubris that only comes from making $5.21 on Medium.com, I dug in my heels. I wasn’t was particularly committed to my stance, but fighting in the comments section is what the internet was made for.
Now time has passed. I’ve mellowed on the issue. Not because I think I’m wrong (never!), but because I realized there might be potential for a moist-related payday.
