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Parking garage, PHOTO: Sarah Lofgren

What Your Favorite Serial Killer Says About You

Because it definitely says something.

Having recently written an article about fanny packs, I decided it was time to dig into another of life’s dark corners: serial killers.

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I wonder what they’re serving. Photo by Hannah Busing on Unsplash

What gender is your favorite serial killer?

Is your favorite serial killer male? Statistically there are more of them to choose from. However, there have been a handful of female serial killers throughout history. If you’ve taken a shine to one of the ladies, then you’re clearly a feminist who is eager for women to finally get an equal cut (pun) of all that murdering.

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“Old tunnel with bricks walls and domed ceiling converted into a skateboarding room complete with ramps and lights” by Rob Bye on Unsplash

Does your favorite serial killer live in the same state as you?

Some states have more serial killers than others. I’m lucky enough to live in the proud state of Washington, which boasts more than its fair share of psychopaths and mass murderers. As a matter of fact, if you measure per capita, we have THE MOST serial killers of any state.

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Photo by Kyle Loftus on Unsplash

Has your favorite serial killer been in the news a lot lately?

You’ll have to excuse us if we don’t believe you liked them “before they were popular”. Yeah, the Golden State Killer is morbidly fascinating and we’re all glad he’s been caught, but if he’s your go-to, then we know you aren’t taking this whole thing seriously. You probably only like sports teams when they’re winning.

Does your favorite serial killer eat people?

Well, you’re a special bird. It’s not enough for a serial killer to murder scores of people. You need them to take it one step further. If this is you, then you’re probably some sort of overachiever. It wasn’t enough to get As in class, you needed those A+s to know you were alive. You were probably also the sort of precocious and intense child who always inadvertantly freaked adults out.

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“A close-up of a microphone in a warehouse in Wodonga” by Tim Napier on Unsplash

Written by

Engaged in inadvisable wordsmitheries and other creative acts. http://sarahlofgren.com

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